A life changed

Recently, I saw a TV infomercial for something called the Kymaro Body Shaper. 

In this infomercial, happy, full-figured women were trying on the body shaper and oohing and ahing over the look of their bodies. Some of them talked about how skeptical they had been before trying this special underwear on. 

After trying it on, their lives were changed.

You can watch the video here.

What does this product claim to do?

New Body Shaper and Bottom Shaper are the fastest and safest way to take off inches in all the important places where we can’t seem to lose the weight. Plus, these two amazing undergarments smooth out the rolls and bulges, giving the simple look of a sleek and slender body. Everyone will be asking you how you lost the weight! No other shaper out there compares to this! Don’t forget we have a 30 day money back guarantee! 

We are always looking for new ways to get the plastic surgery results without having to go under the knife, as well as ways to lose weight with diet or exercise. We have Rodial’s Boob Lift and Nivea’s My Silhouette. Take it one step further and get the Kymaro Body Shaper! Like all the other products, this one will change your life. As the skinny ladies in the commercials announce, this product will turn you from a fat lady into a skinny one. 

And like all the others, the results are amazing. The infomercial includes testimonials from the many women whose shapes were improved by this product. Take Kristie, for example.

Kristie Before (top) and After (bottom)

Modeled by sexy young women, the infomercial claims that this is the only way to get your body back, without plastic surgery, lots of makeup, or strict diet and exercise. In fact, you can lose up to 20 lbs instantly. That’s right, instantly! It focuses on the comfort of your body, with its special microfiber technology hugging your midsection, and distributing your fat evenly. “Just slip it on, and watch as the inches seem to melt away!”  It can help your posture, apparently. It also eliminates back and bra “buldge.” Yup, that’s right. Back and bra “buldge.” That means that instead of being concentrated on your tummy, the fat will migrate to other places, like your hips, thighs, and legs. 

In short, this product promises  you that you’ll be happier, thinner, and be able to zip up your dresses again. Say good bye to your rotund shape and say hello to a new, slim you! Just like the lady on the box.

The reviews are all positive, the testimonies of women with changed lives. 

Oops, not that review. I meant this snapshot of the 5 star reviews! The only 2 star review in this bunch looks like the writer was misguided. 

Of course, don’t check out this site that’s devoted entirely to Kymaro Body Shaper complaints. They say that its a scam and they’re found that it’s too good to be true. 

Some people have even issued a Buyer’s Beware. But of course we’re not listening.

Now for some cool trivia: this informercial has reached #3 among the top 10 infomercials in America. It stars the talents of voice actress Julie Williams. 

Try this product if you want your life to be changed. Do you want to zip up your dresses again? Distribute your fat evenly? Eliminate back buldge? And get thinner?This product is a must have in every woman’s closet.

My Beautiful Mommy

Say you’re a mother of a little girl who looks just like you. Mommy has raised her daughter as wisely as she could, telling her, “Honey, be who you want to be. You can be a doctor, a lawyer, or a CEO of a huge firm. Don’t let anything stand in your way. You are a beautiful little princess, and mommy loves you.” However, Mommy looks at herself in the mirror and says, “Mommy doesn’t look very pretty.”

All things considered, you decide that it’s time to make Mommy pretty just like a movie star! You decide to get bigger boobs, a tummy tuck, and a nose job.

There’s only one problem. How are you going to explain this to  your little girl, who does look a lot like you?

Hunky Dr. Michael comes to the rescue with My Beautiful Mommy! The cover features a very happy child with a teddy bear, gazing at her newly sparkly, beautiful mother who rivals Barbie in appearance.

This book (aimed at ages 4 to 7) is a guide on how to explain to your child exactly why you’re getting the surgeries, in language your child can understand. “A must-have for any mother with young children considering plastic surgery!” (I’m quoting Dr. Michael.) 

Big Tent Books describes the book as an aid to explain your transformation to your children. 

The story guides children through Mommy’s surgery and healing process in a friendly, nonthreatening way.

The only review on this site says,

Great Book! Explains to kids in non-threatening way how mommy has deep-seated insecurities that can be “magically hacked away”! Lets kids know that nature “ain’t perfect”!

Which is all that this book does, and more. 

For example, the mother in the book explains to her daughter that she’s getting a tummy tuck. “You see, as I got older, my body stretched and I couldn’t fit into my clothes anymore. Dr. Michael is going to help fix that and make me feel better.” Then she comes home looking like a slightly bruised Barbie doll with demure bandages. According to Parent Talk Today’s website, the book doesn’t explain why Mommy is getting her nose job. However, she reassures her daughter, saying that the new nose won’t just look “different, my dear — prettier!”

The book doesn’t talk about Mommy’s breast augmentation either. I’d like them to explain that. The illustrations do show that her boobs are fuller and higher. 

My Beautiful Mommy ends happily. The mommy is happy because she will look more beautiful. The child is thrilled at her mommy’s beauty, not to mention being proud to have such a beautiful mommy. Everyone is happy! 

Because we all know how plastic surgery makes people happy. And we also know that you want your child to be proud of your looks. It’s important that your child go through life not being ashamed that his/her mommy is ugly. Things like ugly noses and small boobs are stuff that should be avoided, anyway. 

The book has its own website. It’s available for 20 bucks at Amazon. Newsweek has published an article about it. They write,

Salzhauer got the idea for a book after noticing that women were coming into his office with their kids in tow. He says that mysterious doctor’s visits can be frightening for children. “Parents generally tend to go into this denial thing. They just try to ignore the kids’ questions completely.” But, he adds, children “fill in the blanks in their imagination” and then feel worse when they see “mommy with bandages,” he says. “With the tummy tucks, [the mothers] can’t lift anything. They’re in bed. The kids have questions.”

A bit hard to explain plastic surgery, isn’t it? Easy to explain childbirth (there’s a baby in mommy’s tummy) and sickness (mommy’s not feeling that great right now), but cosmetic surgery? We have Dr. Michael to thank for making the job easier!

In any case, this will help your daughter understand that she can whisk away all her physical imperfections and securities by scheduling an appointment at her local plastic surgeon’s. This will teach her that plastic surgery makes life better while making people happy and proud of you.

Plastic Surgery: Needed No More!

I know that I’ve been talking on and on about plastic surgery and how big boobs are so popular at least in our culture, blah blah blah, but as it turns out,  you might not need to have that breast augmentation surgery you’ve been scrimping for all this time. 

Meet Rodial Boob Job! Rodial has once again revolutionized plastic surgery. This is the way to go if you really want to look beautiful, but are scared of needles and knives and surgeons who look nothing like George Clooney. Now you can have a fuller bust but without the pain.

How does it work? 

From the website:

Boob job works with your natural fat cells. As the fat cells move around the body after eating, boob job “blocks” the fat into the area where the product has been applied, so the bust and décolleté areas. You will see a gradual increase in cup size within 56 days as well as gaining an instant lifting and firming effect. Increase in cup size by 8.4%.

So not only will your beloved bazooms get the lift they’ve always needed, they’ll also get bigger!

This product comes out in June. Naturally, there is buzz. Does it work? Does it not work? If it does work, would you use it?

This blogger has actually used the product. She says,

Ok, I’m still waiting. To be honest, I do notice a change. It’s not a real visible change, but I feel a slight tightening, as I did when I was reviewing Lush Bust. I also notice something I really like–my breasts feel incredibly softened and smoothed. Not that my breasts are a rough texture to begin with, but Rodial Boob Job leaves them extra silky-to-the-touch.

This writer @ Shine! Yahoo says that she won’t (mainly because she has nice ones, already). However,

All that said, if (and when) my breasts do start moving south, I can understand wanting to take action.

Bellasugar.com has written an article titled “Can a Non-Surgical Boob Job Work?” The writer has done some investigative work on this product. She sent an email inquiry to the company with her questions, but has yet to receive any reply. 

This is what she concluded.

So I thought about this some more. The 8.4% growth number is based on 56 days of use. “That’s a rather odd number,” I thought. And then it hit me: 56 days is exactly two menstrual cycles. And right before my period, my hormones go crazy and make my boobs a bit larger than usual. So here’s my theory: Since many women experience an increase in cup size before they menstruate, could this be the reason behind the 56-day test? In other words, perhaps the women in the study did see their breasts grow, but I suspect it has more to do with hormones than with the gel.

The comments varied. Many of the commenters were D-cups and saw no need for the product. Some were hesitant about putting chemical formulae on the “girls.” Another lady preferred padded bras. Still another claimed that it actually works.

ladies, I have been trailing ‘boob job’ and guess what – it does work.

I was really sceptical before i started using it, but they are definitely perter and fuller as a result of using the cream for a few weeks – so much so that people have been commenting.

I have not gained or lost weight in the time I have been using it, or been wearing different bras or clothes.

Its good stuff – no bs!

In any case, it might be worth checking out. 

Instructions of Use: Use twice daily as close to mealtimes as possible. Use for 56 days to see an increase of up to half a cup size. After the 56 days, you can use it twice a week to keep up the good results.

After al, it costs 122 pounds, including sales tax, which amounts to 175 dollars. It’s much cheaper than plastic surgery, as you can see. Good luck! And don’t forget that Rodial has many other products as well, such as “tummy tuck” that can give you the results without surgery!

The Media and Boobies 2: Superheroines and Disney Princesses

Do you remember the other posts I did about breast implants? Yes? I’ve done some more breakthrough research and found that big boobs are not restricted to celebrities, anime, romance novel heroines, and video game girls. 

Women who also have them? Superheroes and the Disney Princesses.

These women are some of the most influential females in our culture. How many times have we watched Catwoman on screen and thought about just how powerful and beautiful she was? How many times have we as little girls watched Cinderella or Ariel and wished that we could be as beautiful as they?

Both versions of Catwoman are well endowed. The comic version you can see here. The screen version was played by Halle Berry. As you can see, the screen version played by Berry is very different from the cartoon version. They wear very different clothes as well. While cartoon Catwoman wears a costume that is very tight fitting, showing off her assets, screen Catwoman wears black leather that is ripped. And a bikini top that *ahem* shows off her assets. 

There’s also Batgirl. I admit that I know next to nothing about the character, but I do know that she has boobs. Big ones.

The Bad Ladies of the superhero world have them too. Do you remember Poison Ivy? I got this image from one of those online quizzes. Which bad lady are you? Or something like that. Can’t find the link.

No man can resist her. And no wonder, for she is the goddess bad lady of sexiness. 

Pamela Lillian Isley was a well-known and highly successful botanist. After learning she has a hyperactive immune system that causes her body reject any infection, poison, or outside contamination, she dons the guise of Poison Ivy and begins a career of crime. Those who spurn or commit acts that harm plant life or the environment become the object of the evil affections of Poison Ivy.

She specializes in hybrids and can create the most potent toxins in Gotham City. Often these toxins are secreted from her lips and administered by a kiss. They come in a number of varieties, from mind-controlling drugs to instantly fatal necrotics.

A kiss? Like this one.

What about the Disney princesses? The princesses are still very popular, ever since they came out in the 1930s. Every Disney heroine is a princess, be it Mulan, Ariel,  or Belle. Around Halloween time, if you’re a trick or treater, just walk around neighborhood. I guarantee that you’ll see lots of little girls dressed as Snow White, or Cinderella, or the Little Mermaid, believe it or not. 

For every girl wants to be a princess. And what other princess than one of the Disney Princesses? These princesses are models of what a little girl wants to grow up into. This poll taken showed that Belle was the considered the best role model for little girls. 

These princesses are beautiful and smart. They have no problem getting husbands. In fact, all they need to do is sit around and wait, and someday their princess will come for them, riding on a white horse and wearing a nice suit of armor. The prince then sees them, falls in love with them promptly, and takes them away to another land where they live happily ever after. The first princess was Snow White. She was followed by Sleeping Beauty and Cinderella. However, in more recent years, the princesses were joined by Jasmine, Mulan, and Ariel. 

I remember a conversation I had with a couple of friends a year ago. The guy friend asked the girl, “What’s your favorite Disney princess?” 

“Oh, it’s Jasmine. Know why? Because she wears pants.”

“What about Ariel? She doesn’t wear dresses. In fact, she doesn’t wear anything.”

Which brings me to another issue. These princesses are certainly not lacking in the body department. They have beautiful, slender waists, long, flowing hair, full lips, and boobs. Ariel is one of the best examples, as her outfit displays. To the point that some parents have mistaken her videos for animated porn. 

Jasmine is yet another example. She has the perfect hair, delicate hands, big doe-like eyes, a perfect belly button… and a waist so small that it defies all reality.

And yes. That, too.

Even Sleeping Beauty is not lacking in this regard.

It’s noteworthy that Disney is not known for making animations with fat or overweight heroines. The only fat character I really remember is Ursula. And of course she’s not a heroine. 

But she does turn herself into a young and beautiful woman to attract the prince. I can’t find any pictures of her, though. If you’re familiar with the Disney story you’ll know what I’m talking about.

More incentive for you to get them.

The Media and Boobies: What should the perfect lady think?

 

The media has a big hand in the popularity of this surgery. Celebrities are some of the most famous people to get enlargements. And when they get it right, the whole world is made aware. Of course, when they get it seriously wrong, the whole world knows as well, leaving us to tremble and say, “Oh, I wouldn’t want that to happen to me!”

To give you an idea, Nicole Richie is on their hall of fame for 10 hottest breast implants. Before, she was like a stick. Literally. Then afterwards, she has these large, perfect boobs on her slender frame. The site (click “get it right”) says that these new boobs have given her a lot of confidence as well. So it’s not just us who needs the boost. It’s celebs as well. 

Hilary Swank also is another one. Her doctor says, “People who have recently ended a long-term relationship quite often undergo plastic surgery. For many of them, it symbolizes a new beginning, or a transformation into a new person.” And after all, she did get her new breasts after her breakup with Lowe.

What about Pamela Anderson? She became famous after appearing in Playboy with massive boobies. You could also say that she was famous for her huge boobies. Later she removed them, shocking everybody. “How would Anderson’s fame be maintained without her implants?” In response she had surgery and went back to her old size, telling people that she didn’t feel like herself without them. People say that she was responsible for the craze in the United States as well as the reason why Australian women are rushing off to get mega-sized implants. 

What about the hall of shame? BOOO. Victoria Beckham is one of the contenders. The funny thing is that Pamela Anderson also made the list. Janet Jackson also did. Heather Mills is there on the right. Draw your own conclusions.

Apparently, big breasts are currently a popular trend in the video game world as well. It’s actually quite common to play a video game and see that the women characters have large boobs. Maybe that’s a reason that a lot of guys who play video games take on female characters. Because it’s fun to watch them walk around. Sometimes I wonder where breast surgery has a place in the video game world. 

Here’s one from the Japanese video gaming world.

And here’s another one from America. Lara Croft: Tomb Raider. Does Lara Croft suffer from backache?

And here’s a link to the top 25 sexiest video game characters of all time. Warning. Some explicit boobies. And turn the volume down unless you want to hear a fat old guy talk about whatever it is he’s selling. 

What do they have in common? Big breasts. BIG breasts.

From a gaming forum:

click to enlarge

The Japanese anime/manga world follows the trend of big breasts. Anime characters have implants, too. Or look as if they do. I remember reading Full Metal Panic and noting that Kaname’s bazooms had to be fake. They’re ginormous. The manga had a few pictures of her naked in the shower, as well as plenty of bathing suit pictures. I could dig up some but I really don’t feel like doing it. The interesting thing is that Kaname lived in Japan in a more or less modern world. Japanese women typically don’t have big bazooms. I’m Asian. I would know. 

The artist is a man.

I’m not sure where this girl comes from, but I found her somewhere. She’s probably fan art drawn by some teenager who has dreams of being a manga artist.

But she’s strong, looks like she could kick butt, has long hair, bandages that only emphasize her curvacious shape, and… the boobs. Whoo. 

Maybe I should have censored it a little.

They actually look quite like implants, if you know the difference. 

Anyhow, moving on. 

Romance novels are another example. The typical romance novel heroine has big boobs and a curvacious shape. If she does not have one, she goes out and gets one. Including the typical story line of a fat heroine who is shy and gawky and fat getting captured by pirates, making her forced to slim down within a year. What stays? The bazooms. Therefore they are implants. Remember Survivor? The show.

The heroine in this novel to your right has zee perfect boobs. And displays them proudly. The guy looks like he may be interested in her. After all, boobies! He’s a desirable husband, but she’s even more desirable. I wonder why he’s not peering down her shirt. The way she’s leaning over doesn’t make it that hard. 

Sorry, my mind is in the gutter.

Notorious Lord, Compromised Miss by Annie Burrows has an interesting cover as well. Her blouse shows off her assets. And why not? 

It should be interesting to note that never once you’ll see a flat chested heroine in a harlequin romance novel. Every single one is beautiful, with cleavage that many would die for. 

From this blog post:

There is a 23% chance that your heroine can fence, knows about guns, and can ride a horse astride, if she has had an unconventional upbringing. She will definitely have long, flowing hair (of whatever color) and pert, milky-white breasts. (Be sure to check these on any potential Heroines so you know which one is the right one.)

Here’s another example. It’s rather graphic in nature (at least for the kiddoes) so I’m linking it instead of posting it here. However, the lady has her breasts bursting out of her clothes (pert is a bit too weak to describe exactly what it is her boobs are doing). The hero is gripping her thigh with furious strength. And he has a bad tan.

In conclusion: Big boobs = owned by celebrities, manga/anime female characters, video game girl characters, and romance novel heroines.

Why not you, too?

The Perfect Lady and Boob Implants

“Then why is it that you stare at naked girls every change you get,” I said, “but not naked men?”

“It’s an aesthetic choice,” Bob [the Skull] said loftily. “As a gender, women exist on a plane far beyond men when it comes to the artistic appreciation of their external beauty.”

“And they have boobs,” I said.

“And they have boobs!” Bob agreed with a leer.

— Turncoat, Dresden Files, by Jim Butcher

With the development of science, plastic surgery has become more and more advanced. Very soon, it MAY be possible to stay young and sexy with only a simple and inexpensive surgery. But meanwhile, we ladies make do with what we’ve got, huh?

And what we’ve got is boob surgery. Of late, breast implants has become the in thing. Not just those women who do reconstruction surgery after disease or cancer, but young women and old women alike. This is not restricted to females; either, but also extends to males. Surprising? Maybe not. This place says that breast augmentation was found in 2006 to be the number one procedure performed by plastic surgeons. This is followed in popularity by nose jobs, eyelid tucks, and lipo.

But why do so many woman want to get implants? Yahoo, as always, has answers. Some of the answers range from self-esteem issues to guy attention to media popularity. And it could be all those things. However, the Montecito Center for plastic surgery has 5 main reasons for getting implants. Some of them include finally fitting in those clothes that were somehow made for C cups. Or maybe your boobs are droopy. Or shrunken. But all that aside… getting a boob job may be able to help you get ahead at work.

Sadly, breast surgery is quite expensive. The cost depends by location, surgeon, and type of implant. Some places offer free consultations. Implant forum sums up the average cost:

Implants: $1000 
Dr. fee: $2000 
Anesthesia: $1000 
Medications: $50 
Filling out a bikini: PRICELESS!!! 
(Prices vary)

This site also offers tips as to how to save for the big surgery as well as how to solicit money for it. There are actually sites that allow you to raise money for your new boobs. I actually found one site that can help YOU get the breasts you want. It has a picture of a rather shapely young woman. 

Ladies… have you ever wanted bigger breasts? But couldn’t afford the expensive costs of surgery?

Here is your opportunity to earn Free Breast Implants!

Gents… help the girl of YOUR dreams, get the body of her dreams. Develop a connection with a girl of your choice and help her earn Free Breast Implants!

This site appeals to both guys and girls. Girls who have always wanted bigger breasts but are poor. And guys who want to help out the girl of their dreams whose boobs just aren’t big enough. There’s also testimonials, and before and after pictures. And featured ladies with sad faces because their boobs aren’t big enough.

This lady gives 5 reasons why getting breast implants was the best 5000 bucks she ever spent. 

But aren’t they dangerous? Maybe. The FDA published an online report about the relative safety of breast implants. And yes, there are risks. Your implants may go all leaky. Or deflate (horrors!) or shift and look like one of those poor celebrities I’ve yet to talk about. This guy over here published a page giving 48 reasons why women shouldn’t get boob jobs. (I’m giving you the AOL special edition version with some of the pictures blocked out and a few “swear” words changed.) The pictures are quite graphic, but they show you what COULD happen. (And my, those boobs look like soccer balls hanging off a poor lady’s chest. Not what you want. Ever.)

Men, you can have them as well! Ever feel insecure about your small chest size? You can actually take pills to improve the size, in some cases. However, it’s been proved to be more worthwhile to get the pectoral implants. If (horrors!) you have exercised and exercised and are unable to have nice defined chest areas, this is your chance. They can also give you a huge boost of self-confidence so you can be like this:

Just look at that man, standing tall and straight, with his bulging pectorals reaching toward the sky. He has self-confidence, that one. Whether he exercised for it or got implants. 

This brings up another issue. What if, after the pectoral surgery, your man’s breasts are bigger than yours? That’s certainly a bit of a problem, isn’t it? Why let him have all the fun? You can tell that that woman is a bit sad because she knows that after the implant surgery, his body leaves hers far behind. He, like a good man, is comforting her.

COMING UP: A look at the hand the media has played in the popularity of breast augmentation.