The perfect woman and the perfect man
There’s something I’ve realized. For the perfect woman, there is the perfect man. But what makes a perfect man?
I used to think that the perfect man would look something like that. However, after many romance novels and magazines, I realized that I was very, very wrong.
The perfect man looks like this.
It’s pretty clear to me! You need a man who is SEXY. And he cannot be sexy unless he is also athletic. And the sexiness is produced emphasized by his “Man” perfume. A six-pack is a must. Just look at those bulging biceps! *drool*
Speaking of bulging biceps…
Some men get their muscles from using perfume. Some of them do not. If that’s so, then they got them from following the steps in Men’s Health. If Oprah or Cosmo was the woman’s manual for perfectness, then Men’s Health is the man’s manual for perfectness.
Our favorite romance novels also mesmerize us. Why? The age-old tale of beautiful women and handsome men falling in love and ripping each other’s clothes off never grows old. However, these novels are good for another reason. By reading them, you can learn about what makes a good mate and also learn what kind of person he should be.
He should be tall, dark, and handsome. Again, the bulging biceps and six pack are emphasized here. He must be romantic and good in bed (come on, a man as handsome as that who walks around with no shirt must be good in bed). He must also be adventurous and look untamed. The perfect man walks around shirtless (as you can see from Hunting Down the Horseman) or have his shirt manfully open to his waist (To Seduce a Texan). That or a tight business suit which also looks like it’s going to come off because of the pull of passion. Anyways… we must not forget another important thing.
Smooth pits! Hairless chest! A man who takes the time to shave everywhere else is definitely worth it.
Celebrities and movie stars make good models of the perfect man. They are rich, handsome, and charming. Look at the kind of men our perfect women are with.
Many women think George Clooney is dreamy.
I prefer Sean Connery. He has nice eyebrows.
What better example than the actors who play the studs in the movies?
Finally, take a look at your favorite magazines. Oprah gives us checklists of what to look for in a man and what NOT to look for. Cosmo tells us that, and more. And more. They also have a guy gallery with plenty of guy pictures. And all of them hairless. Smooth pits. You got it. He should also work. I don’t mean have a job, though it would be great if he were a millionaire businessman. Know the saying, “Try before you buy”? Do it. If he doesn’t work, you can always take him back to the store. A perfect man needs to work. Some women have known the horror of dating a man oozing with charm just like this guy until they used the 99 things to do with a man and “tried” him out and found out that sadly, he didn’t live up to his claims of seduction. Must have been the perfume.
I have made a nifty little checklist you can tear out and place in your handbag.
The Perfect Man:
3. Exercise religiously
4. Six pack from exercising religiously
5. Bulging biceps from exercising religiously
7. Dark (unless he is Edward Cullen/a vampire)
11. Go shirtless or have shirt manfully open to waist
12. No buttons
13. No hair, either
14. In his armpits. Or chest
15. Wear tux, sometimes
17. Fulfill Oprah’s checklist
18. Has to “work.” You know what I mean.
If he does not fulfill all the items on this checklist, immediately TAKE HIM BACK TO WHERE YOU FOUND HIM.
Have fun! I wish you success!