Archive for May 25, 2009

The Perfect Man: Abercrombie and Fitch Man

I have evaluated many of the perfect men so you’ll know what you’re looking for. We’ve established that he should be hunky, wear purple vests, and be criminally handsome. However, there is another man that you should think about.

The Abercrombie and Fitch Man.


Neanderthal man

36,000 years ago, our foremothers fell for Cro-Magnon man. Then 6,000 years after that, Neanderthal man appeared. The ladies were smitten. Now, in the 21th century, man’s evolution has realized a new pinnacle of achievement with Abercrombie and Fitch man! He has sneaked onto our shopping bags, displayed his manly body on billboards on the highway, and stolen our brains and money, as well as our hearts. 

amber4Abercrombie and Fitch man is buff, athletic, and good-looking. He is also young, and in black and white always. Sometimes he has a girlfriend, sometimes he just stands there alone, gazing soulfully and masterfully into the distance where his next paycheck is. 

He also has no shirt.

a&F-store-fifth-ave-717098Since Abercrombie and Fitch man’s arrival not so long ago, he has been quite popular. Walk into his house, and you will see him and his many girlfriends on the walls, watching your every move.

74112245JS003_Housing_MarkeIf you walk down the street anywhere near a mall, chances are that you’ll see shoppers (usually women) with shopping bags. Guess who is on the shopping bag? The much celebrated Abercrombie and Fitch man! These shopping bags are not just used one time to put clothes in after shopping at one of their stores. They’re used and reused for different purposes. I know a girl who uses them to store toiletries. I knew a woman who donated hers to our church’s yard sale. And then my church hid the bag in the closet and promptly forgot about him.

p1200121I guess poor Abercrombie and Fitch man is still there. Not all churches are very appreciative of his hunky good looks. 

Abercrombie and Fitch man even has his own perfume! Actually, he has many. But the one we’re looking at right now is called “Fierce.” The word can be compared to his washboard abs, his gaze, and his pectorals.

41VIEthSJpL._SL500_From a review here:

great scent..
top note is a citrus smell
base note is a woody musk smell
I do not own this cologne but i smelt it in an Abercrombie store. This scent smells similar to colognes in Hollister. This is a classic cologne for teenagrers and the chicks love it!!

Another review:

Anyone who walks near an Abercrombie and Fitch will recognize this scent, the scent that, along with loud music, potentially lures males and females inside. It’s an excellent smell for younger-mid 20’s crowd, but even those older can pull it off. Great diedown scent, especially.

Other comments described it as “sexy.” And as we can see from the first review, the chicks love it!

Cluck, cluck.

2007_12_abercrombiefierceDon’t forget the billboards, which we’ve already mentioned once earlier. Rather coincidentally, this is also an ad for their perfume “Fierce.” Abercrombie and Fitch man’s headless torso decorates billboards across the country. Anyone driving down the highway can admire his washboard abs. If the driver is female, they may look at him and say with a sigh, “How Fierce.” If they’re male, they’ll envy his abs for a brief second, perhaps consider getting the perfume, and then say “nah” and drive on. 

Check out this wacky billboard here. 

Abercrombie and Fitch man has created quite a stir for his presence in advertising. Many articles have been published, complaining that he is causing young males to try to reach for an unattainable goal -to  have a buff and muscular body just like his. Some places says that Abercrombie and Fitch is using sex to sell their products, and proclaim that they are going too farOthers ask whether or not using such a handsome dude in advertising brings in the money, or is it due to other forces.

But if most guys do not want to see pictures of other guys not wearing shirts, how would this help Abercrombie to sell clothing? And why does a recent ad campaign feature a man and a monkey walking together on a beach, with neither one of them wearing shirts?

Still others believe that is he ruining the way young kitties look at themselves.


However, you can’t deny that he is popular. I know both guys and girls who get clothes at his store and urge their friends to do the same. I went on his website to have a look around, and he is there in all his glory.

gallery_abercrombieSome time ago, there was a lawsuit against Abercrombie and Fitch. According to the opposing party, Abercrombie and Fitch were discriminating against salespersons and models who weren’t white. If you look at the ads, you’ll notice that all the models are white. There’s no Spanish, Chinese, or African-American models. Some people also said that Abercrombie and Fitch were delegating their less attractive salespersons to the back of the store where shoppers wouldn’t see them. This lawsuit was eventually settled, with 40 million dollars paid to class members in December 2005.

I think it’s safe to say that Abercrombie and Fitch is going to stick around for a while, at least until the next link in the evolution of mankind comes up. If you aspire to be like him, you can apply to this place to be a model. This site tells you exactly what you’re in store for when you become one of their models. 

At least for now, you’ll wow the chicks.

PS: Check out this press release from Abercrombie and Fitch about their first quarter results.


May 25, 2009 at 11:54 am 3 comments

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